I need a bookie

Kurt Warner retired today. He had a great story, excellent career, blah blah blah. I might be willing to bet cash money that Brett Favre will announce his retirement again within the next couple days, solely because he can't stand the idea of another retiring quarterback hogging the media spotlight and being praised for a great career. I hate Brett Favre.

Which of these does not belong?

This one.

Go Away

Scram

Git

Beat it

Fuera

Get out of my sight

Leave Scar, and never come back

Bounce

Get thee to a nunnery

GET OUT

Leave me alone

It's over.

Standards

So unranked PC beat number 19 UConn in basketball tonight. PC beating ranked teams is not extremely rare, last year we beat Syracuse when they were ranked 15th and Pittsburgh when they were the number one team in the country, but it is a noteworthy event, especially since any win here is an exciting event. I had a feeling that we might win tonight, which I think may have been based on last year's victories over ranked Big East opponents. I didn't go to the game, but was pleased to see the final score of 81-66. "Oh cool, we did end up beating UConn. I'm going to go on with my night now." Unbeknownst to me, defeating the 19th ranked team in the country is equivalent to winning the national championship, because the yelling outside and jubilant Facebook statuses are making me feel like I missed the game of the century. Look, I'm all for school spirit and getting excited about big wins. I was at both the Syracuse and the Pittsburgh games last year. I stormed the court and got wild and went out to Clubbies to get drunk and celebrate. But this isn't beating #1 ranked Pitt, or even #15 ranked Syracuse with the girlfriend-beater Eric Devendorf. This is UConn. They are ranked 19th right now. That's almost 20, which isn't really all that impressive. Yeah, they beat Texas when Texas was number 1 last week, and yeah they're historically a good team, and yeah they're a Big East Rival, but storming the court? Really PC? That's all it takes these days, a blowout win against a team barely in the top 20? I'm embarrassed. What's next, burning down the Dunkin Donuts Center for making the NIT? Come on now. That's just unprofessional. No wonder we're not taken seriously. Step it up please.

The Duke and the Dauphin

I think a large reason for my slight disdain for the way my college and presumably most colleges work is that it makes me feel limited in what I am allowed to learn. At my school at least, there are several required courses that have to be taken if you want to graduate, as well as the ultimately ineffective Development of Western Civilization program that seems to be the pride and joy of the school. All these requirements can severely and unnecessarily limit the amount of classes that a student can elect to take. One of the factors that influenced my decision to major in English was that the school only requires me to take 10 English classes before I graduate, whereas other areas of study dominate your schedule with prerequisites and sequential courses. Ideally I would be able to just take whichever classes I wanted to, similar to the movie Accepted, but realistically I am limited in what I can study and am forced to specialize. I don't want to specialize. I want to know everything.

Explanation of title: This post was written primarily so that I could use this title. Sorry if I wasted your time. The duke and the dauphin are two con artists in Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. One of my favorite quotes from Mr. Twain is "I have never let my schooling get in the way of my education," an accomplishment I am envious of and hope I can imitate. Unfortunately, I think I am nearing the point where my schooling will get in the way of my education, which makes me wonder what I'm spending all this time and money on here.

Chilly Phones

I went cold-calling yesterday for work. Cold-calling is one of the techniques I will be using to find customers this summer who want me to paint their house. I guess it's how I will get most of my jobs this summer, probably because it is easy to do and I can identify houses that have obvious problems with their paint. In a nutshell, cold-calling is like trick-or-treating, except instead of asking for candy you are asking to (in my case) paint the person's house, and there is a less likely chance for success with most houses. This trick-or-treating analogy is easier for me to make because the first neighborhood that my district manager and I worked in is essentially in my backyard, thus making it our prime trick-or-treating territory. Yes, it was a little weird to walk through this neighborhood trying to make money rather than scheme candy, but it was a good place to start. One of the fun things about doing cold-calling as a painter is that many of the target neighborhoods have obscenely large houses, since these are the most profitable houses to make. After practicing in my Halloween neighborhood, we aimed solely for the small cul-de-sacs where money grows on trees. Unfortunately for my painting endeavors, these beautiful houses were also immaculately painted, but we took solace in the fact that we got to see dream houses that actually existed.

I got a little off-topic and you probably still don't know what cold-calling is. When cold-calling as a painter, one locates a target neighborhood and just starts knocking on doors. Rather than asking for candy when the homeowner opens the door (or stares at you through the locked door), one introduces oneself, explaining the nature of the company. Dropping the word one now. If you're lucky, the person owning the house is indeed looking to have the house painted again and is not a self-proclaimed painter. Usually you aren't lucky. Because of the nature of cold-calling, you are able to hit many houses in a short amount of time, thus increasing your chances of getting a lead and a potential job. That is all I have to say about cold-calling.

Explanation of title: I feel obligated to title this post and now I need to explain my dumb title. Cold-calling is not necessarily done over the phone, and then I guess I played with words a bit and came up with "Chilly Phones." Great.

College

There's a kid passed out in my doorway. He's not getting up tonight, we brought him a pillow and moved his legs so we can close the door. Another kid has taken our extra mattress so his friend who is visiting can sleep on it while my friend has an slumber party with his girlfriend (Illegal because my school doesn't allow members of the opposite sex to stay past midnight/2 AM).